Met up with the Diva last night at The White Swan (typical Diva style - 20 minutes late). We were joined by Wednesday-night-connoisseur Ian (see this marvelous post about a typical Wednesday at The Swan). I hadn't been to this pub for a few years but was pleased to see that not much has changed. The place was chock-a-block with 30 somethings in straight drag. Umbro, Hackett and Adidas still rule in Limehouse. We did spy two skinny Gaultier queens in matching vests and crap hair and I'd like to say that they injected a bit of style into the room but they didn't so I won't. There were three contestants for the amateur stripper contest (technically four as the first act was a duo). The double act were a young fella from Denmark and his boyfriend from Brazil. They were very drunk and took the stage first and began snogging each other. They slid about in their socks, tore clothes off each other and made the Diva wee himself with laughter (this was NOT an erotic routine). The tranny compere insulted them then booted them off stage before introducing her next contestant. His name was unpronouncable, he was from Poland and he was built like a brick shitter. Unfortunately this body building hulk couldn't dance to save his life and had his kit off within a minute of starting his 'routine'. He did finish by doing the splits though which was quite impressive. The last entrant was a 24 year old Tesco worker with the body of a 54 year old Tesco worker. He had spirit and a smidgeon of rhthym as well as a bunch of mates in the crowd so he won. The Polish body builder looked distraught. The winner is forced to strip again before he is awarded the £100 prize so it's a good job the double act didn't win as the Diva only had one Tena Lady with him last night.
I had fun so thanks for asking me out Mike.