Dog packed off on his holidays – check
NYC itinerary finalised – no
8lbs of waist fat removed for holiday – no
Laundry laundered – no
Beard dyed – no
Mermaid outfit sorted – no
NYC bloggers contacted – no
Fear of meeting one’s hero’s – check
Saturday night NYC disco experience sorted – check
Spells ordered to cool NYC down before Thursday – check
Talcum powder bought to soothe sweaty 80° ass-crack – no
Sandals/flip-flops/mules bought – fuck off!