Can't. Stop. Watching.
(watch it all and wet ya self laughing).
Thanks Jocko.

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It's a long post with limited appeal but I really enjoyed writing it
In Time Out this week they have a list of the 100 greatest London gigs ever. Dunno how they landed this list but it’s an interesting read. I’m not a big gig-goer but I managed four in the list of 100.

No46 – Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five. June 20 1981. The Venue in Victoria (now a pizza restaurant called Ask).
I was 16 years old and had started coming down to London with mates on the National Express coach. We would usually stay for a couple of days and never used hotels. We would rely on all-night movie showings at the Scala cinema in Kings Cross (why was Liquid Sky or Pixote always on?), or clubs that didn’t shut till dawn (St Moritz, Gargoyle or Batcave). Days were filled with Kings Road strolling and hanging out at weirdo Kensington Market.
The Clash had recommended Grandmaster Flash in NME interviews so it was great to get to London and discover tickets were still available for that night. I don’t remember too much about the event but I do remember that it was a mostly white audience and that I was worried about that fella on stage brutally scratching his records “he’s gonna need a new needle after tonight”.

No25. Manic Street Preachers. 21 December 1994. Astoria.
This was the last of their three night run at this venue. The first two nights sold out in hours and the third was added just a week before the show so demand wasn’t as great and I managed to nab a ticket. It turned out to be the best night (so they say). They were blinding, utterly fantastic, painfully loud and tight as a ducks arse under water. This was the Holy Bible tour so anger was the raison d'etre on stage. There was camouflage netting behind the band and minimal stage lighting. They played right up to the 11pm curfew and then the lights were turned on. That’s when Nicky and Richey started to trash the equipment. The crowd bayed for more, the roadies stayed at the side of the stage (this was the last night of a long tour), amps, guitars and netting were all hurled to the floor and Christmas was just four days away. Champion!

No24. Pet Shop Boys. June 7 1991. Wembley Arena.
Less costume changes than the chaotic show at Wembley the previous year (the one with the Derek Jarman films) but beautiful staging by famous opera-set designers. I went to this show with a girl from work and she admitted that she fancied Neil Tennant and not Chris Lowe! Her white stick and Labrador secured us great seats.

No19. The Jesus And Mary Chain. March 15 1985. North London Poly.
I lived and worked in a pub in Fulham in 1985. I begged for the night off to go to this gig. I had a mono cassette player in my bedroom and played ‘Upside Down’, taped from John Peel, several times a day. It was a very exciting period as it was suddenly OK to enjoy different styles of music; Sade, Smiths, GoGo, King Kurt (OK, maybe not that last one). I remember standing outside the venue waiting to go in and the JAMC arrived on foot carrying their guitars and ignoring the jibes from the crowd (folk loved to hate them at the start because of their ‘fuck you’ stage attitude) and swanned in through the stage door. When they took the stage over an hour late, with the house lights on, bottles and glasses flew at them. They attempted to play something but the roar of hatred from the crowd drowned them out. So they turned their amps to 11 and leaned their guitars against them which made 1000 people immediately cover their ears to stem the flow of blood. They stood at the edge of the stage and stared at the crowd before walking off leaving a satanic noise screaming through the hall. That’s when the speaker stacks were pulled over, the curtains set on fire and the police rushed in. I was euphoric on the way home. The violence and noise had been perfect and I had to tell someone. I called my mate Gary in Northumberland from a phone box to tell him about it. His mother answered and said “check your watch next time you call David, we’ve all been in bed for over an hour and I’m doing an early shift in the morning, goodnight”. Back down to earth with a crash.

Other gigs in the list I would love to have attended:
No87. Scissor Sisters at Brixton Academy, October 31 2004 (that Halloween show).
No82. Bjork at the Royal Opera House, December 16 2001. Never seen her. Must change this before I die (or she does).
No60. Swans at the Town and Country Club, October 14 1987. I love a good ear bleeding.
No56. Einsturzende Neubaten with Showaddywaddy at Kilburn National, September 7 1987. A dream double-bill.
No28. Bowie at the Rainbow, August 19 1972. Roxy Music supported, full Ziggy costume show and Elton John in the audience.
No13. Soft Cell farewell show at Hammersmith palais, January 10 1984. An event apparently.