Funny article in the Guardian today about a farmer from Orkney who has been brought to London in a sort of reversal of that celebrity mucking-out show The Farm on telly. He’s great and remains unfazed by dinner at the Ivy (sitting near to Gail from Coronation Street), a minimalist hotel room at The Hempel, a dance at Chinawhite and a haircut and manicure at Dunhill. When he was asked if he sees any point to London he says “we need London to blame for everything that’s gone wrong in the country”. Bless.

And also in today’s Guardian is a piece about the President of Nigeria banning the national football team from wearing their hair in braids. He says that Nigeria’s youths are copying the football stars and that in the developing world the braiding of hair promotes homosexuality. So, if you’re not gay and you have braids in your hair then you soon will be. I mean, look what happened to David Beckham after he grew out his braids.