If this motherfucking blogger problem isn't fucking resolved soon I'm going to fucking fly to the motherfucking U fucking S of fucking A and split some skulls with a fucking big shiny motherfucking axe. Fuckers!

As you can probably tell I'm a little peeved at blogger at the moment. My site takes 15 minutes to load and I've tried every trick in the book to fix this. Is this bloggers way of asking me to upgrade from the free service? I'm so annoyed with them at the moment that I wouldn't even give them the steam off my piss. Cnuts.

Update:
Looks like threatening violence works.

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We usually go to a 50's stylee fish and chip shop in Walthamstow market on Saturdays and sit in formica booths and eat greasy food. But yesterday Lucio and Mike came over to our house for lunch. Which meant I had to go to Sainsburys again (see below) for cooked chickens and salad type things. I bought 3 litres of red French table wine in a box (so classy) and 3 bottles of 7up and we drank lots of jugs of poor mans sangria. Then we finished a bottle of Absolut and started on a bottle of Kazakh vodka given to me by the President of Kazakhstan a few years ago. I hardly ever get drunk and I don't even like the company of drunks but yesterday we all got insanely drunk and had sex with each other (and Edward) in our garden while the neighbours tried to ignore us.

That last bit was a lie. When Mike and Lucio left at 8pm we called Rob and told him we were coming round for tea and biscuits (God knows how we thought we were going to get there as we were both blind drunk). Then we fell asleep. Rob roused us a few hours later with phone texts asking where the fuck we were. Sorry Rob. Too late to leave our manor we staggered round to the co-op and spent £5 on biscuits and pork pies then watched 'The Man Who Wasn't There' (featuring the fabulous Scarlett Johansson).

Surprisingly chipper today. Done nowt though.